On December 10, 2013, at approximately 2:45am, my Dad drew his last breath this side of eternity. When my sister called to tell me, the quote above came back into my head. I had been thinking of it off and on since my Dad's decline. I had been praying that God would make my Dad well enough and strong enough to have one last Christmas with his family. God didn't and he wasn't.
Why is it that we pity the dead? Their troubles are over and they are, in essence, asleep. When they wake, the next face that they see will be that of our loving Saviour. I rather envy them. Don't worry. I'm not going to do anything rash. I will let nature take it's course, as it were. I just mean, they are done with all the crap here. No more bills or taxes or disease or death. True, there will be no more laughter or love, at least for now.
I have found myself again struggling with my anger toward God. My Dad loved God. He told our Pastor and a few other people that he would rather die from cancer and know his salvation was sure, than to be healed and lose his salvation. I get that. I really do. I know that my Dad will be resurrected on that great day. I know that God answered his prayer and that my Dad was right with God and yet, I'm still angry. I have a Facebook friend that had a cancer scare. This friend does not believe in God and scorns God and Christians every chance he gets. My Dad loves God and dies; this man hates God and lives. How is that even fair?
That is exactly the question I posed to God. Why does Ray get a pass and my Dad doesn't? Through my tears and sobs came the answer. "Your Dad was ready to meet Me. Ray isn't and I want to give him every chance to be ready." We serve a merciful and loving God.
"God isn’t late with his promise as some measure lateness. He is restraining himself on account of you, holding back the End because he doesn’t want anyone lost. He’s giving everyone space and time to change." 2 Peter 3:9 (MSG)
I know there are those who would excuse my anger and pettiness by saying it is a natural reaction to the situation. It is. A natural reaction for a sinful nature. My anger and pettiness are part of the selfishness I have yet to overcome. I don't wish Ray any ill will and I am glad for him that his diagnosis was not more serious.
Today, we celebrate my Dad's life with a memorial service. I know so many will be telling us they are sorry that he lost his battle with cancer, but that just isn't true. Dad didn't lose his battle with cancer. Nicole Johnson is one of my favorite Christian Dramatists. She wrote and performed a dramatic piece called "Stepping Into The Ring." There are a couple of lines from this drama: "And no one who fights with their hope in the Lord ever loses the last round. In order for cancer to win, it would have to be able to follow me beyond the grave--and it can not." My Dad did not lose his battle with cancer. When Jesus calls forth the righteous dead, my Dad will rise up. He will be whole and healthy and there won't be a cancer cell in site. Now that is a victory.
John Donne wrote a series of Holy Sonnets. One of them is quite famous. It is called, "Death, Be Not Proud." This man totally nailed it. He really understood that Death has no power over those who believe, trust, and take God at His word:
Death, be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so;
For those whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow
Die not, poor Death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure; then from thee much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and soul's delivery.
Thou art slave to fate, chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell,
And poppy or charms can make us sleep as well
And better than thy stroke; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally
And death shall be no more; Death, thou shalt die.
"Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and above all, those who live without love."
