This morning, I did something I don't normally do. I hit my snooze button. Three times. Now, I didn't say I've never hit the snooze button, it's just something that I don't normally do. Normally the alarm goes off, I groan and turn it off, and then sleepily get out of bed. Usually with a longing look back at the warm bed I just left. But not today. Today, I allowed myself the luxury of three, count 'em three snoozes. And really that's all they are. I'm not really sleeping at that point, just dozing. It's funny, though, when I am in that state of half waking, half dreaming doziness, I seem to have the most clarity of thought. Maybe because there is nothing to clutter the process as there is in waking moments; maybe because in dreams your mind communicates with symbolism. Whatever the case may be, I had what might be called an epiphany. As I dropped back down in the the second "snooze" the thought occurred to me that I have been hitting the snooze button on my life or at least areas of my life. For years. Over the last 20 years I have wondered if I could write a novel. Last month I quit hitting the snooze button and gave it a go. Result? I have nearly 40,000 words (and counting) of a novel and I am going to finish it, whether it ever sees the light of day or not. That is my goal.
Sleepily, dozily, I began to think of other areas in my life where I am hitting the "snooze button" and I realize there are more areas than I am comfortable with. Here are a few that came to mind:
My weight. I have been hitting this button off and on for most of my adult life. Up until the last few years, my weight wasn't too bad. In the last few years, however, I have gained so much weight that some days I'm surprised I don't explode (Think Monty Python's Meaning of Life, the restaurant scene). I don't mean that I eat to excess, but I don't choose the right things to eat. I know what I should be eating and choose the wrong things anyway. I just keep slapping that old snooze button.
My home. I hate cleaning house. I would rather do anything than clean house. Clean house or a root canal? It's a toss up, folks. The problem is, there are people I would like to have over after church on Sabbath. Friends I would like to spend a Sunday afternoon watching Harry Potter movies with. Or even just spending an evening sitting around chatting and catching up over a hot cup of tea. I just keep slapping that old snooze button.
My spirituality. I love God. I really do. Sometimes, I wonder if I'm just a fan. You know. Rah Rah, Sisboomba! Go, God! Sometimes I think my faith, my spirituality is only skin deep. I want it to be deeper, but I'm not sure what that entails. Do I have to give up FaceBook? Big Fish Games? Harry Potter? Does it mean I need to spend more time in prayer? But I have so much to do! I need to loose weight; I need to clean my house. SLAP! I hit the old snooze button once again.
I have to start now because tomorrow never comes. Remember Scarlett O'Hara? "I won't think about that now. I'll think about it tomorrow. After all, tomorrow is another day." Only when she was faced with the loss of the love of her life did she recognize the fact that she couldn't put it off until tomorrow. She had to figure out today what she would put into action to win back the love of Rhett.
Now, I must do the same thing. Figure out today the actions I'm going to take to resolve the snooze button abuse of my life.
What are you hitting the snooze button on?
May God bless you and give you clarity during your dozy moments.
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