Today, I have been cleaning out my old car. I'm giving it to some friends of mine that want a little run-around car that gets good gas mileage. I still need to vacuum it out, but after that, I will be relinquishing ownership. Am I sad to see it go? Surprisingly, no. Although...I must admit to a small twinge of nostalgia, lightly colored with sadness that it will no longer be my car. Let me tell you a story.
Once upon a time, I didn't have a car or a driver's license. I rode public transportation to and from work and got rides with others for groceries and such. I wasn't interested in the added expense of a vehicle or renewing a driver's license every four years, either. Also, I lost my license due to unpaid parking tickets in LaLa Land, California. Every so often, my Mom would bug me about getting my license. I would always turn a deaf ear. I didn't want one and I wasn't going to get one.
Finally, in the year of our Lord, 2000, I could no longer tune Mom's litany of "You really should get your license...When are you going to get your license...You really ought to have your license." out. To shut her up (hopefully), I said I wanted to start with getting my learner's permit. After all, I reasoned, I hadn't been behind the wheel of a car for a long time. I needed to practice because I would probably be required to take a "behind the wheel" test to get my driver's license. We went to the DMV the next Monday that I had off so I could take the written test to get that learner's permit. I didn't tell Mom, but I had not studied the hand book that she had given me. I didn't even riffle through the pages. I figured I would take the test and fail and that would be it for a month or three. Ha, ha! The joke was on me. I answered the questions, most of which I remembered from years before. I passed the test. I was even in the mid 90 percentile. Holy drive shaft, Batman! I left the DMV with a learner's permit and Mom handed over the keys. The interesting thing was, I had forgotten how much I really like to drive. Once I got behind the wheel and got going, it all came back. Just about a month later, I was at the DMV taking the driving test and getting my bona fide driving license. Ok. I had the license. Now what?
Again, on a Monday I had off, Mom loaned me her Chevy Tahoe. After dropping her off at work, I went home and grabbed some of my CDs and then I set about to do some errands. I was at the light on Lindell at Sahara when I looked to my left and say a marquee on the Budget Rental Car Sales lot. They had cars for $88.00 down. I could do that. I had $88.00. I went to the lot, test drove my future car, and got my Dad involved. He had to secure the loan for me. My credit was so tanked, I couldn't even co-sign for the loan. By the end of the day, I was the owner of a Ticket Me Red 2000 Chevy Cavalier LS.
Not long after that, I got an invitation to my 25 year high school reunion at Rio Lindo Adventist Academy. My Mom began a campaign to get me to go. Finally, I let her book a motel room for me in Santa Rosa, California. (I spent the first night in Tulare with my cousins, Dawn and her daughter, Tiffany.) I did that to shut her up. When will I ever learn? Dad gave me one of his gas charge cards to use so that I wouldn't run out of money filling up on gas. I had to pay him back for what ever I charged, though. (I have since learned that he never cashed the check I gave him for the gas.) I was so excited. My first road trip in years!
I checked into my motel room in Santa Rosa, you know, the one that keeps the light burning. I showered and changed and set about finding a place to eat. I settled on a Chinese place I found in Coddington Mall. With butterflies in my stomach (and a fair amount of lemon chicken and fried rice), I drove into Healdsburg and up the hill to Rio. I went early because I wanted to walk around the campus. It had been over 20 years since I had roamed this beautiful school and I wanted to see what had changed and what had stayed the same. My first stop was going to be the Admin Building. It houses the Principal's office, the library, the auditorium, and a few classrooms. It also has large, framed photographs of each graduating class. I wanted to look at my graduating class' photos; see if ours was still hanging on the wall. I walked up to the building and was suddenly inundated with memories from my time at Rio. By the time I reached the front doors (they were locked), the tears were flowing fast and furious. You see, my life hadn't gone according to plan. I was going to find myself a nice SDA man to marry, have a few kids, and live contentedly going to church, potlucks, church socials, and other church related activities thereby assuring my salvation and place in Heaven. That did not happen. Instead, I met a young man (SDA) that broke me heart and left me without so much as a backward glance. I got mad at God and at the church, made sure the doors didn't hit me in the hinder on the way out, and proceeded to leave behind everything I knew to be right and true. My motto was: Lead me not into temptation...just point me in the right direction and I'll do the rest.
But not that day. That day, standing at the front door of the Admin Building with tears streaming down my face was different. I heard God speak. Very clearly. I will never forget what He said to me: "I miss you. And I want you back." I gave myself to Him right then and there. I had a lot to learn and a way to go, but me wheels were finally on the right path.
I have had my share of back sliding, trials, and general troubles. Each has served a purpose. To help me rely on, lean on, and trust in the Great I Am. Each step in this story was leading me to a better way. So, yeah. Maybe I'm a little sad to let this car go to it's new home. After all, it was the one that drove me into my Father's waiting arms. I'll tell you something else. I'm looking forward to the next chapter of road trips in my new SUV. God always surprises, but that's ok. I've got a full tank.
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